Life, when it’s boiled down, it comes to one ultimate goal…to fit in, to BELONG!
From the playpen to playground and beyond in the big, wide grown-up world we strive to find that group, however big or small, that makes us feel accepted, loved, understood, appreciated and that we matter: Our Tribe.
For most of us our tribe starts with family, who else really can make you laugh like them, I for one, haven’t come across many who can make me laugh til I make no sound quite like my nearest and dearest.
They know your story and you know theirs. They have your back (most of the time) and when life throws you a curb ball they pick you back up, dust you off and smack you on the bottom to play another day.
Some of us, however, do not care to be members of their family’s tribe and seek membership elsewhere. There is a never ending collection of like-minded souls and communities lighting up the globe at any point in time ready for new additions/pledges.
We often hear people say they are “black sheep”or “misfits” yet regardless of what they are seeking, thinking,doing,feeling, wanting, needing, creating….someone else is too!
It’s a beautiful thing.
There are just so many variation and yet there seems to be some common denominators…
The 6 Types of Tribesfolk
1) The active member of every tribe
This tribe member is fabulous, a wonder god or goddess of communities, on the board of everything…whipping up scones for a charity bake sale, while taking notes as the secretary before car pooling to soccer. They are a powerhouse of organisation, promotion and team spirit. Take note of how many likes they receive on social media, birthday wishes and their glorification of busy.
2) The tribe dropper
“Oh, when I was at Splendour in the Grass, Silverstone, Glastonbury, the Country Club, Swimming Nationals, Paris Fashion Week…insert impressive group here [……………………]
You get the picture.
3) The tribe sampler
One week it’s tennis the next it’s scrapbooking then onto anything and everything else they hear or read about or a friend may have suggested, but nothing really ever feels right or keeps them interested until the next craze sweeps the nation.
4) The tribe that fits just right
This tribe member is super happy with their community, bordering on obsession, may include stickers on cars, mugs, items of clothing and galleries of photos. Usually for those interested in a certain breed of animal, sports club, automobile or community group.
5) The Family Tribe aka The Clan
They are tight, I mean tight. This lot love, love, love their family and prefer to hang out with each rather than mix it up and meet new folks. Usually seen in clumps at parties or other social events, share a lot of family snaps online (possible excessive sibling tagging) and may have partners looking rather awkward in a third-wheelish manner.
6) The tribe absconder aka The loner
This broody cat is a rebel and just for the sake of it refuses to be part of any group that may pigeonhole or constrict personal growth, preferring to walk the earth alone just like the Incredible Hulk.
So anyway, recently I found myself a little tribeless…of course, I have my family but my fabulous, naughty 20’s something tribe of party girls all grew up and moved away which caused us to slowly drift apart leaving a rather large void. They say you lose a lot of your old friends in your 30’s and make new one’s in your 40’s…so I guess I’m just treading water waiting for my new friends to pop up in a couple of years.
Thing is I don’t really want to make new friends…it takes time, commitment and a fair bit of weeding out of people who I really have no interest and may be forced to feign friendliness i.e. school mums.
So on reflection, that would kinda have me tiptoeing between The Clan and The loner group… until now.
As you may have read in an earlier post I decided to give the February Photo a Day Challenge a whirl and I loved it! (#fmsphotoaday @fatmumslim)
I decided to open an Instagram account as there are more people getting into it via this medium and besides Facebook isn’t really doing it for me lately, and just like that …I’m trying on a lap lap and pretty, new headdress. Who would have thought my tribe would worship photography? Not me.
People are so encouraging, kind and all sharing lovely photos with the world in an easy, simple yet inspiring way. In a snap of a lens (or the press of a screen) you have connected and you feel part of a community.
It’s not for everyone but it suits me down to the ground at this moment in my life. So, while it may not be a community garden or club like Apex, Rotary or Lions, involve a sport or actually interacting with anyone face-to-face it makes me feel like I belong..that I’m part of something…good.
So, for any other folks who are feeling a little lost or tribeless and are looking to try something out of the box say “try everything..be the sampler”…get into challenges, networks, classes or groups that may just turn out to be something that you never knew you always wanted. Happy Hunting!!!